Thursday, June 24, 2010

Where am I going to school??

It has been crazy around here as we prepare to move and I look at where to continue my education. UT being my first choice just isn't in the cards for me or as I would put it, not God's will at this time. My second choice? TCU. Has anyone ever looked at how much the tuition is there??? Oh my! So, I am touring UNT tomorrow to check it out. I was a little hesitant because it wasn't really in my top 5, but I do know alot of people that have graduated there including loved ones so it is definitely growing on me. I am still seriously thinking of taking the Fall semester off for a break and to get the kids settled into a new school/neighborhood. We will see. Maybe a mini-mester. Anyways, I wanted to share an essay I wrote for one of the schools. I thought it was cool and I don't think that of my own writing most of the time. Let me know what you think! And..I'll let you know if I will be Mean Green or a Horned Frog. A Horned Frog with a heckuva lot of debt to pay back. Whew.


From the seat of an old tractor, the fields went on for miles. I would watch my daddy feel the dirt in his hands as if he could feel it breathe. From the back windshield of our old Monte Carlo, the roads went on forever. I would crawl up against the warm glass and fall asleep counting the stripes in the road. From the top of an oak tree, the ground looked hard and unforgiving but I lay on the branch to watch the clouds form into unobtainable mountains. The world seemed so big, yet I knew I could somehow touch it. I could run through the mile-long fields and eventually find there was a dirt road that served as a boundary. I could press my face against the window and wait patiently until I saw the old white house that was my home. I could climb down the tree and know the mountainous clouds would eventually fade into night. As a child, all of these things made themselves known to me but none served more definite than the fact that Texas encompassed them all and I knew then that I never wanted to leave. I am still that wide-eyed curious child. I seek adventure. I have a glass that’s half full. I see my goals within reach and they begin to take the form of a wide open Texas sky.

As a farmer’s daughter, I never had much in the way of material possessions. One thing that my daddy did give us was an educational drive. He pushed us beyond our limits with our school work. He encouraged us to drive forward and be something he never had the opportunity to be. A man that seemed genius to me gave it all up to work a farm for his parents, all the while watching his sisters go on to higher education. It has been years since he has passed on and I still find him somewhere deep within me encouraging me to do more. To be more. Sometimes, when I speak, it is not me talking to my own children, but the voice of my father telling them to push forward and drive. It’s time that I remind myself to do just that. It’s time to listen to that voice within me. It has been a quiet whisper as I set myself aside for my family. That whisper has become a roar these last few years. A roar to be heard throughout Texas. I will do more. I will be more. For my dad. For my kids. For me. I have the drive within me. The drive to go beyond the mundane into extraordinary measure.

I had put off the inevitable for years to take care of three very individual personalities and while doing so, lost sight of my drive. My drive found me at a conference for a non-profit organization reaching out to youth. While speaking to the founder, an epiphany came about. Here I was, so involved in everything I wanted to do, all the while not doing anything I needed in order to take it to the next level. So my journey began. Never in a million years would I have thought to take on a full course load with three children; but I did it. Not only did I do it, I did it with enthusiasm. I was in my element of both motherhood and student. It was as if I were made for both to coexist. With diapers in one hand and pencils in the other, I faced the challenge head on and have come out stronger because of it. As I look back at that same horizon on a field that is now a thousand homes, I can close my eyes and see my dad grinning at where I’ve been and where I’m going. I’m doing what I was made to do. Maybe not in the world’s view of the right timing, but in my own. Everyone thinks insanity has taken over me as I tote a book bag with my diaper bag. I just smile and watch my kids watching me. They watch me read. They watch me study. They see me learn. That, to me, is the greatest achievement of my life. Taking the drive that my father gave me and being able to see my children witness it and absorb it. I never want to stop the display. I never want to stop learning. I want to drive.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Just a Vessel

For the last two weeks, I have been a part of a team going into the Dallas Juvenile Detention Center. What a blessing it has been! I'm a little bummed that I have to have surgery again next week so I will miss all the girls terribly. Here is something I wrote about my first week! More to come...


When I first felt the desire to work with young girls at the Juvenile Detention Center, I wasn't sure what to expect. I knew it would not be easy and I knew it would not be an immediate bond. Nevertheless, God has always put His will on my heart to work with young girls in difficult situations and I was both excited and nervous to see how it would unfold. Wednesday evening, April 28th, we entered Dallas Juvenile Detention Center for our first Girls' Circle meeting. We weren't sure how many girls to expect, let alone if they would be responsive at all to our lesson and activities. I felt I had realistic goals and expectations. I knew the girls wouldn't trust me. I really wasn't even expecting them to talk to me the first day. Boy was I surprised! What started out a little awkward, ended up being a warm beginning to what I hope to be a long relationship with fourteen very special girls. Fourteen girls lined up for a seat in the circle. Not all fourteen talked openly but they did share at least their names and things they were good at. This meant more to me than any of them will ever know. As the minutes passed, the girls became even more comfortable. I know that this is just a tiny look into what the weeks to come will be. I looked into some of their eyes and saw quite a bit of hurt. I spent time on my way home praising God for breakthrough as well as some tears shed for the hurt that brought them there. They can do so much more with their lives. They can be so much more. They ARE so much more. They dream of friendships and family. Things that I have taken for granted. They dream of being loved. I can't wait to show them the love of a Father who sees passed the guilt and shame and sees them for all that they really are. I can't wait to see what God has in store for these fourteen girls He has placed in my path. I can't wait to see how He will use me for their benefit as well as His glory. I am so grateful for the opportunity. ~Ecclesiastes 4:12~

Saturday, April 3, 2010

Easter!

What a crazy week this has been! I received cast number 2 ON my birthday on Tuesday. Had an MRI on Wednesday to see what's taking my foot so long to heal and found out on Friday that I have to have surgery next week!! One wrong step on a volleyball court cost me a ruptured ligament, a dislocated joint and a fracture! Whew! So next Wednesday, I will go in to have screws put in my foot. I secretly admit I always did want to baffle the officers at the metal detectors. I will start ministering at the Dallas Juvenile Detention Center this month so here's my chance! I am just not looking forward to having my foot up for several more weeks, several more casts, lots more pain and back into the OR to have the screws removed after all of that! I guess I better just start accepting a chaotic house for a while. Thank God for mothers!

Even though I still can't get around well, I did want to make sure the kids decorated their eggs to take to Nanny Vest's tomorrow to hunt. I was gathering things for my Sunday School lesson anyways and making cookies so I tried to knock it all out so I only had to be "up" once. I am in awe at what my kids listen to and think about. I love to listen in on their conversations when they aren't fighting and especially when they think noone is around. I always loved Easter growing up. Well, once my step-dad came into the picture anyways. I love the spirit of Christmas, but Easter I loved even more. The spring colors, the dresses, the warm weather and the grace and mercy that surpasses all. When my dad would preach about the crucifixion and resurrection it would bring tears to your eyes. He had his doctorate in Theology and was always ALWAYS studying. Before beginning his sermon he would always say he doesn't like to sugar coat the crucifixion. He felt that often it wasn't portrayed how it really was and that even he could never come close to describing the inhumane torture that happened to our savior that day. But, nevertheless, he would tell it so distinctly that you felt you were there. You grieved as he described the skin hanging from His body having been beaten so badly, and you rejoiced as you listened to the part of the stone being rolled away. I'm thinking of him and the story tonight as I try not to get down about my foot. I bet he would say, "It may seem like Friday night, but Sunday's on the way." I miss him terribly this Easter season.

Sometimes I don't know how much my kids actually listen and when I was filling their egg color cups up with vinegar tonight, Reese commented on how yucky it smelled. Ross told her, "you know, they gave vinegar to Jesus when He was on the cross." I smiled as I kept pouring and Ross continued to tell her the story. It doesn't matter how many times I tell it, they seem to listen more intently when it's Ross telling it. I don't care who tells it, as long as it gets told. The birth of Jesus is a beautiful season but the death and resurrection of Him is worth so much rejoicing! I am saddened that it is not praised as much as Christmas as I think about it tonight. I hope all my blogger friends have a beautiful Easter Sunday with your families. I am missing the family that is already gone but also rejoicing with the ones I still have here to hold!

Monday, March 22, 2010

Things NOT to do while in a cast

Over the last few weeks, I have learned what can and cannot be done in a cast. So, if you ever find yourself in a cast, here are a few things NOT to do.


  • Don't insist on going down a long flight of stairs. You will fall. You just will. It's Newton's law.

  • Don't try to care for three kids and a house on your own. Just accept that it will become a dump before you are recovered.

  • Don't take showers. Just live in filth until the blessed day comes for cast removal.

  • Don't think that your arms can automatically handle three weeks of crutches. You will plead for mercy at the end of day one.

  • Do not, I repeat, DO NOT attempt the zoo. You're poor petite friend will be left with the job of pushing you UP hill in a wheelchair.

  • Don't get excited about the motorized carts at Wal-Mart. They will start to get old when you are stuck like Austin Powers.

  • Don't try to mow the grass. You will inevitably run out of gas and be stranded waiting for someone to bring you your glorious knee scooter.

  • Don't try to dress up. Nothing you can do will glamorize fiberglass.

  • Don't bother planning a Sunday School lesson, because all the kids will be too fascinated by the cast and apparently in awe that you hurt yourself.

And finally the number one thing to NOT do while casted:


Refuse to ask for help!! Thanks to Bart and Mom for trying to make my life somewhat easier the last few weeks!

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Forged

What a year this has been for me and my family. I have alot on my mind tonight and am a little pensive as I lay in bed. The Biggest Loser on TV and Reid asleep by my side. I watch him sleeping and wonder what lies ahead for my kids. What kind of mother I have been and how handling what comes my way reflects on that. I have been through a lot in my lifetime. I don't like to bring it up much because things are easily used as a crutch. I feel I am better than that and refuse to let things define who I am. But I am also learning that you can't escape some of those definitions. I also know that you can take those same harmful past experiences and grow from them. This year has been a forging of sorts. A spiritual roller coaster. Emotions ranging from pain to anger. Back to pain and feeling you've beaten the odds. Then some things tend to happen and you begin to feel like you will never make it to the top to see the horizon before you. Honestly, I've been quite angry with God this year. How healing it is to finally say that. Maybe I should've said it sooner. I've told many people that I think God wants to hear us say this. He knows our hearts anyways. Anger is a passionate emotion. It also means we care.

Tonight I feel beat down and I ask for prayers. I want to be close to God and I want to know that when bad things happen, He longs to comfort us. This forging is more than I can bear sometimes. The only drive I have is knowing I have to keep moving forward through it for my family. I can't give up. I can't let the bad win. I just have to ask, how much can one person be expected to bear? I feel the weight so heavy on my shoulders. I just want to set it down. I led a group therapy this week for class. It was on self-forgiveness. I used Max Lucado's book "Traveling Light" as an example. Carrying the burdens we were never meant to bear. The burden of shame and guilt. Fear and hurt.

Tomorrow is St. Patrick's Day. Some know the difficulty it brings but many don't. God knows and I just ask that He shows his presence for me tomorrow and as an anniversary grows near. I'm not sure how much more I can carry. I have to have faith that He will never give me more than I can bear. I know that I will not get burned in the forging process, but rather shaped and molded.

Here's my song for the week. The Almost again. I find healing in music. I find strength in the lyrics. It's called No I Don't.

I'm looking for some stable ground/ Some kinda place to lay it down/ And settle for a while/ I'm sick of looking for a star/ I won't show anyone my scars/ Can you help me out?/ I wanna see a change in me

When it's time for another round/ I get in then, I bow out/ I'm kinda freaky that way/ I used to stand as tall as I could/ I used to be better than good/ I guess I've made my bed/ I wanna see a change in me

No, I don't listen when they tell me/ They think I won't Come back around/ Find my way out/ It's none of their business! It's none of their business!

I've got another song in me/ Because of you, I'm changing/ I'm learning how to wait/ Ugly as I could've been/ Down and out and all broken/ You never made me wait/ You saw me/ You didn't see my shame/ I'm free because you said so/ And I'm learning to grow/ Because you held my hand/ I'm free because you said/ Go, keep walking

Sunday, March 7, 2010

Overnight Transformation

I'm going to skip the Debbie Downer blog for later because it was a long day to experience again. Basically, car breaks down, miss class and landed in the Urgent Care center for a broken foot. On to better things.



What happened to my eldest child this week? Just a few weeks ago, I was talking to some moms about Ross not having any interest in girls yet. He could've cared less. He was more worried about Halo and sports and inventions. Then, she showed up one day in conversation. A little girl that Ross has been in class with since Kindegarten. Ross made a comment in passing that she might like him. I said, "oh...do you like her??" He shrugged his shoulders and went on. I knew the day was coming. And I guess I hoped she would be a first girlfriend for him. Cutest thing ever. Best girl athlete we have. Super smart. Perfect, right? Yeah, in about 5 more years!! A couple of days later it happened. "Mom, can you ask Bridget's mom if she can go to the movies with me/us this weekend?" Ok. OK. I can handle this. I really can. Luckily, I know her mom. That helps. We email back and forth laughing about the situation. Ha ha. HA. She comes and watches Ross play basketball Friday night AND Saturday morning. They go to Dairy Queen Friday night. Insisting they sit by themselves. My mind is a whirlwind. I can't keep up with it. My baby. MY baby. I was glad that her mom decided to go to the movies as well and we brought the younger siblings sans Reid. No way would I go there. Ross and Bridget sit alone while we sit close by. He was so handsome. So courteous. I watched them thinking both have grown up so fast. I remember them playing t-ball together....then kindergarten. Now between kids and teens, unsure of where they fit in. He is already texting her today. I think I lost my place. It is a bittersweet sting. I guess it's inevitable. I remember 4th grade all to well. The boys that liked me were jerks. Well, other than Bart, but then again, he was too shy to tell me. Glad he grew out of that!! I'm glad Ross already has good taste at his young age. And I know there will be many others. It was just like an overnight transformation. One day it was Halo and the next it was deodorant and Axe. Enjoy your childhood my love. I won't let you out of it that easily. What kind of mom would I be?

Monday, March 1, 2010

March Madness

I just realized today is the first of March. Well, I guess I didn't literally realize it. I knew it was coming but forgot that it started TODAY! I will be glad when it's over. I know. 30 more days to go, right? Okay, here we go since I've been in a list making mood lately. Top Ten reasons I will be glad when March comes to an end: (drumroll please)

10. One month closer to the end of this stressful semester!
9. My baby will be celebrating his 4th birthday on April 5th!!
8. I, however, turn 34 during the month of March. Bleh.
7. April marks the official beginning of baseball!! I heart Josh Hamilton if you didn't know.
6. SPRING!!
5. Which means we are closer to SUMMER!!
4. Garden planting.
3. Shorts wearing.
2. I will have my biggest assignment behind me!

And the number one reason why March should hurry? Well, that blog will be later this week but I buried my dad 20 years ago this week. Time sure has flown by but that gentle reminder is always there.

So, March, there you have it. I know I can't skip you every year and I'm definitely not one to wish for time to "hurry". It's just that twenty years is a long time. A big number. I would rather move past it and enjoy the spring as soon as possible.


Oh and Ross and I went to our first dance! Professional pictures coming soon! If I had a picture of my dad on my laptop, it would look like Ross. :)

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Saturday Smiles

Things that made me smile today:

  • Noticing more freckles on Reid's nose.



  • Giving my sister a heart attack by making her believe I had my niece's lip pierced. (Totally priceless!!)



  • Having a "play off" on Guitar Hero at Main Event. (Okay...so several)



  • Singing lyrics with Cheyenne at the top of our lungs while simultaneously playing air drums. (Anberlin of course)

  • Reese falling asleep before my hair was completely white.

  • Knowing that tomorrow is Sunday and my sweetie will actually be home to have a good family church day.

Monday, February 8, 2010

Another great season!

Another basketball season comes to an end. My Tigers got 2nd place again and I'm very proud of all the boys. I am looking forward to a week or two of some kind of a break, whatever that is! We also had all of the boys over for a sleep over Saturday night plus a couple extra to celebrate a belated birthday for Ross. Pictures coming soon. Note to self: Do not have 12 boys over to spend the night again. Ever. I am still exhausted.

So for now, I'm a little sad to say goodbye to basketball. These are great boys, even if they were up until 7am and trashed the house like a frat party! I've enjoyed having the privilege of coaching them another year.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Group Therapy

I should be studying instead of blogging. The books are looking at me but my ADD doesn't want to concentrate on them!!



So, one of my big classes this year is Dynamic Group Counseling. It's major, because as I start out my counseling career in the Drug and Alcohol field, I will use group therapy quite a bit. I won't lie...I was a little afraid of this class. It intimidated me. I have never experienced group therapy as a patient (suprising I know) let alone ever led a group. My first week of class was interesting. I have run late every day because of the wonderful parking situation at GCC. With Reid's preschool schedule, I can't get there any earlier to at least start walking my 2 mile hike to class any earlier. I felt like everyone in class had either been in group or led a group before so I felt a little behind. My second day of class, I tried to be smart and park in the "dirt". Uh...the dirt was mud and our 4-wheel drive is out so guess who got stuck? Not only stuck, but stuck enough to have to get the maintenance guys to get a backhoe!

So obviously, my start off to the semester was definitely with a bang I guess you could say. Then something happened yesterday. We started actual group therapy. We have to learn all the theories and practice them in a group setting. Each of us has a turn in leading, in which we get the majority of our grade from. Tuesdays, our professor demonstrates that theory and Thursday, the student that picked that particular theory leads. Let's just say I have never had a class where I both cried AND got peed on. It's amazing how many abuse survivors choose counseling as a career. Paying it forward. So, yeah, I'm not quite as alone in my endeavor as I thought. This semester will be a venture of sorts. I am thinking by the time it's over, our class will not want to part. I already love my professor. I'm already empathetic with my classmates. Am I ready to lead the group? Well, I'm a little closer than I was a few days ago. Luckily, I have until March 11th!! Oh and the peed on part...well...our class is raising a baby it seems and I've been waiting on the chance to hold him. He is 4 months old. His grandmother is a student but she doesn't look like a grandmother. She is younger than my mother. Anyways, I knew he was wet when I picked him up. I didn't care. I have a feeling it won't be the last time.

I guess I better study. You know I'm going to leave with lyrics obviously. I'm thinking between two songs in my head as I write. I'll go with the shorter one. I have come to absolutely love a band called The Almost. Aaron Gillespie writes with such raw honesty. I love it. Maybe I will open MY group session with some lyrics. What do you think?


-Dirty and Left Out-
Hello, I swear I won't be too long
Hello, I promise I'll be real strong
Wait up, I just wanna tell you
Hold up, why are you still here?

I've been dirtier than you wanna know
I've left earlier than you'll ever know
Why do, you wanna be all listenin' to me
Why do, you spread your arms and tell me I'm free
Why do, you wanna be in my life
In my life

I've been dirtier than you wanna know
I've left earlier than you'll ever know

Jesus, Jesus, Jesus
There's something about your name
Master, saviour, Jesus

I've been dirtier than you wanna know
I've left earlier than you'll ever know
Jesus,Jesus

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Music!


Well, crazy me went to a concert last Friday with my favorite concert partner, Cheyenne. (my niece) I am looking at some permanent hearing and nerve damage to my left ear after my last concert, when I was right next to the amps and since then can hear nothing but static. I go to the doctor in two weeks to find out the results of my MRI. Will it keep me from going to concerts? Not at all. That would be like taking a part of me away. Music is my life and especially Christian rock. Finally, after all these years, we have great lyrics, guitar riffs and music to appeal to even the hardest of rockers that didn't think it was possible to have both a great Christian message AND great rock. It's what I do. It's who I am. It's part of what I'm called to do with working with teens and adolescents in the future and now. I've had people tell me I'm too old. I spend too much time into my music. I go to too many concerts. You name it, I've heard it. Try telling that to my niece, who I take to every Christian rock concert that comes within a 50 mile radius. That's also part of what Bart and I love to do together. A passion we share.

To put everyone's mind at ease, last Friday, I did at least wear an ear plug in my bad ear and was still able to achieve the perfect concert experience other than getting elbowed in the face and hitting my niece in the jaw while jumping around like fools in the mosh pit. Here are some lyrics from a band called Children 18:3 and I think of them quite often when people try to put down my love of music and concerts. I have also posted a couple of pics from the concert last week. It was The Wedding, Pillar and RED. Great music, great guys, great messages. Rock on!


It's alright it's a stereotype
And I don't mind if you use it
It's alright you can say what you like
Just don't mock the music! ~Children 18:3

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Light and Heavy

It's been a long weekend. I know it's a saying we all use, but seriously, it's Sunday evening and I feel like the last two days have felt more like ten. A few days ago, my baby turned 10. I laid in bed Saturday morning just thinking about the last decade. Where did it go? Have I been doing enough? Am I preparing him for what he will be faced with the next few years and for the rest of his life? This last year has been a year of milestones for Ross. He has had his first experience with church camp, accepted Christ not long after that and was baptized as well. Ross is my tender hearted, loving, giving, considerate and sensitive child. Unfotunately, he sometimes wears his feelings on his sleeves and I feel the need to protect him at times when I probably need to let him deal with harsh winds. There is nothing to me more beautiful than a son's love and relationship with his mother. It is unique and a relationship that paves the way for future relationships with others and especially eventually a wife and how he will treat her. I take this very seriously when it comes to my boys and how they will grow in their relationship with God and their relationship with me. Of course Bart has a role in there somewhere. (ha ha!)

So this weekend, Ross wanted his best friend to spend the weekend and also requested to be by themselves with no siblings! So Reid and Reese had plans elsewhere and Ross and his friend played video games and did boy stuff and laughed and did disgusting things and well, you get the jist of it. I was also alone all weekend due to Bart's schedule so I wanted to spend some time with my niece so I begged her to come over Saturday!

It wouldn't take much reading of some of my blogs to know how close I am with my niece so I try to pencil myself into her busy schedule when I can. I love our talks and feeling like I can contribute to her life. This weekend brought both that opportunity as well as the opportunity to just be quiet. Yesterday afternoon, I "helped" her break up with a boyfriend she felt was more of a friendship. (Oh how I remember those days..) She had pretty much made herself sick over it for the fear of hurting someone's feelings. I sat in the car with her and listened and she tried to explain to a 14 yr old boy why she felt the didn't need to be "going out" anymore. After she hung up, we sat there in the quiet as she replayed the situation and waiting for the relief to come of finally having done what she felt needed to be done. I could tell immediately that she wasn't sure of herself. They had been good friends as well. This was the first boyfriend she has really had that treated her as a 14 yr old should, he was shy and quiet and not pressuring at all, which she has dealt with already unfortunately. We rode together by ourselves to the video game store while the boys rode with my sister. She was at a loss on what happened next. Had she just done the wrong thing, would they still be friends...how did it work? Oh how I wish I knew the answers to all the questions that she had. I mean, I'm supposed to be a future counselor right? I talked to her of my own teenage experiences which were much similar. I always hated the break up period. Even when I didn't like someone, I never wanted to hurt anyone's feelings.

The evening progressed and her mood only worsened as she thought of what she had done and any pain she might've caused. As trivial and young as it sounds, I felt for her as I realized just how much we are alike. On our way back to the house, I could see the tears just streaming down her face. The boys were in the back messing around and horseplaying so I tried to divert any attention that might've come her way. I could tell her tears were quickly turning to uncontrollable sobs. I wanted to stroke her hair and tell her it would be okay. They would be friends again before she knew it. I also remember at that age that you don't really understand the dynamics of how that works. It's all about here and now. So, instead, I turn up my rock music to allow her to cry as loud as she needed until it was out. My heart breaking as I listened. For once, even I was at a loss for words.

We got to the house and I told the boys to go ahead. I prayed for the words to help her understand what she was feeling but they never came. So, when we got inside, I pulled her to me and wrapped my arms around her and didn't say a word. Just let her cry. I wanted to carry the weight of the situation for her. I love her that much.

She went to the restroom and I thought, hmmm...heartbreak+teenagers=CHOCOLATE!! I begin to whip up some brownies and I went to my room to grab some sweats to enable me to eat chocolate! When I got there I hear the loudest and worst sobs coming from my bathroom. I tiptoed out so she doesn't know I heard. I had to take my plan to the next level. Funny movie!! I popped in House Bunny, crab the snacks and our Starbucks and finally got her to laugh! At the end we curled up in bed and I watched over her for a while thinking about how devestating life seems at that age. I'm glad I can be a part of her life and I'm glad that sometimes I know the words to say and I'm also glad that I know when to be quiet. Just like God wants us to be still and listen to Him, I feel like there are times when we need to be quiet for others as well.

I was so tired this morning, I overslept for church. I wanted her to sleep so she would feel better as well. It will come as no suprise that tonight, the young couple are back together as of this evening. I'm so glad I don't have to relive my teenage years. Whew!