Free Treasures, Yet Not so Free by Tammy Wisdon-Virgin

This is something my cousin wrote and really touched me today so I wanted to share. I never knew there was someone else in the family that loved to write as much as me! Thanks for sharing Tammy!


Imagine unearthing a treasure so valuable that it takes your breath away or leaves you in awe wanting more. This is what I ran into today as I was clearing out one of the flower beds. I began to pull up weeds. I tugged on roots and found some black tarp that was used to combat weeds by the previous planter, however, underneath that tarp was good soil! I had to push my way thru layers of mulch, shingle pieces, and even a Capri Sun pouch to find the tarp but there it was. I thought, "well this is clever. I've done this before." Matter of fact, I was thinking about doing that again once I had prepped the beds but the treasure I was seeing before my eyes distracted me.As I sat right in the middle of the dirt, I noticed there were two kinds of roots that I was having to wrestle with. The first I'll call superficial, only grew as far down as the tarp. The other, deeply rooted and so hard to pull that I literally feel on my behind a few times. It wasn't going to win though; I was going to make sure of that. Anyone who knows me knows that I have a stubborn streak within me.Right in the middle of the bed I began to tackle the stubborn root that wouldn't budge. I dug away at the dirt and dug some more to get to the root. Now, this root was underneath this tarp. It didn't have a barrier so it was free to grow and seek out the necessary nutrients. In the middle of the flower bed, sitting on my backside, hands dirty, no filthy, with dirt and fertilizer and the true treasures began to be seen. It's not the treasure that you can sell or clean up and use a decorative ornament. These treasures are those you cherish and protect within your soul, within your heart. God began to speak to me through the dirt and work at hand. Remember, I had two kinds of roots I was dealing with but I also had the black tarp material.The black tarp. What's the purpose for it? Well, a practical use is to protect or create a barrier from unwanted elements. But it's also used to hide or cover up things we don't want exposed. Sometimes if you pull up a tarp you might see a cherished vintage car or you may see a rusted, decrepit piece of junk. Either way, that tarp is a cover up. For me, it was a cover up of good soil that flowers need. Instead of using it, whoever it was, covered that soil and created shallow beds that was barren, except for the weeds. Isn't that like each of us?We cover up our faces with masks and cover our lives with lies. We hide what we truly are. We're depressed but we say, "I'm fine." We appear happy and joyful but behind the scene we're falling apart at the seams. We build walls so that no one can penetrate the very depth of our souls. I'll decide who or what is allowed in my "turf" of life. We cover up the results of anger with make-up or long sleeves. We hide addictions by pretending there's nothing wrong. We overcompensate the bad within by doing works of "good" thinking no one will notice. God showed me that we cover up ourselves way too much that we've forgotten what it's like to be real, to be shown, and to be who He wants us to be. From the time of Adam and Eve, we've been covering ourselves from shame and guilt as if no one can see through the charade. He also showed me that those lil roots are our attempts to clean ourselves up. We make ourselves pretty because of the ugliness inside. Our attempts are feeble and won't take a good hard grasp because we don't have the foundation to grab hold too. For those of us that call ourselves Christians, we have a lot of growing to do but if we can't or won't take the time to pull out those "weeds" of life, they are going to choke out all that is good. We say we are free but live in chains. We say we love Christ and want to be like him but we don't want to read on how to do that. We want to know God more and more, we say, but yet we don't take time to talk to Him. It's time to be naked, figurately speaking, and say what we mean and mean what we say. Let's be real because it futile to hide. We usually end up exposed anyways!Those hard to pull roots, well those roots were deep in the soil. I worked on that for what seemed like an hour. I had to work my hands and fingers deep enough to reach underneath and pull. First, I had to break away all the lil bitty roots to get to the big ones. But once I did it came out and I won. Or did I?You see those deeply planted, growing roots represents the world. We've been engrained with worldly ways for so long that they've grown way deep into our minds and hearts. You can read in the Bible that the "bad" things in our lives needs to uprooted. You can't just cut the plant, tree, or weed at ground level. It will come back. We can cover them up hoping they won't sprout through but ya know what? They're still there underneath. The only way to truly get rid of something unwanted is by getting to the root of the problem and ridding yourself of it, just as I did with that one stubborn thing right in the middle of the bed.You see, even though I have the bulb and the main part of the root base, I didn't get it all. There was one left but I couldn't find it in the dirt. With my own hands it's impossible but if I had the right equipment I could probably do it. However, it would no longer be by my own power. I was reminded of Jesus' teaching of He being the Vine and we are merely the branch. Remove the branch from the vine and it can't produce fruit. Remove the plant from the root, well, it dies. So does every attempt we do in life to make ourselves better. We just simply can't do it on our own power. I say let's take off our masks, the phony perceptions we give and be real. Let's be real with ourselves and let His power be made in our weaknesses. It's futile to do so otherwise. I began to look at myself at that point of the day, the point of God's lesson/reminder as I was holding the root mass in my hands. What have I been covering up? Have I been deeply rooted or have been only allowing my roots to go so far?I'll be the first to say I've covered some things up. I've said I was fine when I really wasn't. I've tried to handle things on my own without going to the One who can do it for me, thru me. As I washed the dirt and grime off my hands and as it turned to clay-like substance I began to think of how God had fashioned me. I reflected on how each detail of my being was strategically and methodically thought out and prepared for me. Who am I to question and try to drive the car of my own life. I don't know the detours or the roads laid out before me but He does. I think I'll slide over into the passenger's seat and give him back the wheel. I may not understand the why's, how come's, and what for's that will/has come. But I do have a choice to trust in Him who has my best interests at heart. Just when I thought I had seen the good soil today I found another treasure. Underneath rocks, boards, and black tarps (oh how they liked those things) I found a small pond. Imagine covering up a water hole capable of sustaining life and even giving life as if it wasn't there. Hmm, don't we do that too? Turns out a simple task of clearing some flower beds turned into a treasure find. I didn't say a treasure hunt because, to be honest, I wasn't looking for any. It was simply a task. Jesus isn't a task but our source of life and in Him, well, he's the only covering I need and that's perfect. My little treasures just so happened wasn't free. Jesus paid for all my sins, shame, guilt, and even my inadequacies with his Blood. It cost Him everything but the good part is, He wouldn't have done it any other way.Take with it what you may but this was a good day. A good weekend. Not because of what I've done or how I've felt. It's because of my time with Him. There's no better feeling and there's no price that can be paid to ever buy it either. To me that's priceless.

This and that!

Baseball is in full swing for Ross and Reese is kicking with soccer!

Just wanted to post a few random pictures since I've been so neglectful of my blog!

Heavy and Light

I realized when I signed on tonight that I have not written a blog in over a month. Since then, I am a year older but not much wiser. My baby also gained a year. It has been a month of heavy hearts and light conversations. As we said hello to a new baby niece, we also said goodbye to a dear grandfather. A first of many for a nine year old. A first time to say goodbye and to experience a loss. A first for the mother that had to explain death and wipe away tears at a funeral. How do you explain life and death when all they know is laughter, ball games and the occasional fight with the siblings? To my suprise, Ross explained it perfectly to his brother and sister. This became apparent when at the graveside, Reid (a 3 yr old) blurts out "Gene Pop is NOT there...he's gone!" Yes, a 9 year old's explanation to his siblings was that it was just a body. Gene Pop's spirit is already gone to be with Jesus. I couldn't have said it better.


Tonight, I took my niece to hear Jamie Tworkowski, the founder of my favorite organization, To Write Love on Her Arms. An organization that started as a few friends reaching out to a girl that was hurting. What started out as a t-shirt has turned into a movement. A movement to encourage love and hope. As I sat there listening to him and the story behind the organization, I realized that I had no right to be sitting there as if I am actually doing what I am meant to do. All my life, I have done what everyone else thinks I should do. I have a passion within that fights to get out and I just bury it back down. There is always some excuse why I can't think of what I need to be doing. Busying myself with kids and classes, trying to convince myself otherwise. Afraid that I don't possess the right tools that helping others requires, but the desire within me to reach out is growing stronger every year. God planted this desire in me long ago. He let me know that I have hurt and gone through all that I have for a reason. To help youth and others hurting. After Jamie spoke tonight, I had the privilage of talking to him for a moment. The voice inside getting louder as I listened and becoming more inspired. I feel like Moses. "Who, me?? Are you sure you don't mean that other much more outgoing person over there?" Yes, my thoughts are heavy tonight but my heart is light. It feels lifted as though I finally feel at peace about my journey and excited about where it will take me. I started a study with the ladies at church recently. Part of the study included a board that had a verse or words of inspiration written on it. Each quiet time session, we were to write something that spoke to us on the back of the board. The point of why I am telling this is that the boards were wrapped. You didn't know what yours said until you picked one and opened it up. God works in awesome ways. I picked one out and on my way home from church, I opened it up. My board reads: "Here am I, send me". At the first study, I heard something and wrote it down on the back of my board. I wrote, "God will use you when you are willing." I want to make a difference in at least one young girl's life. I am not perfect. It's okay that I am not perfect. God doesn't need perfect. He can use my broken life. Not to mend someone else's broken life but to offer the connection. To offer hope and love. To show a young girl that God never meant for bad things to happen to her and that He loves her and wants to hold her and comfort her the way only He can do.


I noticed on Facebook tonight that my niece posted her status as "Love is the Movement. You best believe it! Thank you Mims (thats me!) for telling me about TWLOHA!"


I love my niece. She turns 13 this week. Getting ready to face a big cruel world. I will make a difference in her life. Hopefully I already have.